All is in flux.
All is uncertainty.
I recognize that at the decrepitude of 27 years of age, I am past the height of cool.
The world will shift, and I will jog to meet it or be left behind.
But if there is any mercy in you, Gen Z -- flared, bootcut, straight legged, pegged, wide legged, pleated mercy -- please do not bring back low waist jeans.
They looked awful on those of us who weren't thin even when we were young.
I will not return to that suffering. Please do not inflict it on each other.
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